Wednesday is for Weightloss

Happy New Year! You know what New Year's is a great time for? Starting new things! C'mon, everyone's doing it, right?

I think breaking New Year's resolutions is as much a tradition as making them, but I still think it's good to make them. Why? Because the process of making resolutions forces you to evaluate your life, pinpoint where you need work and identify ways to change. Sure, we might all give up after a while, but there's still some level of awareness there and it's far better than stumbling blindly through life, oblivious to our faults.

Of course, even better than making resolutions is making a solid plan to stick with them so that next year's resolutions won't be the same as this years!

My New Year's Resolution is to workout 5 days a week. I carved out a chunk of time while my kids are at school and my husband is home between school and work so that I can go and get a workout in. That's my plan. Hubby comes home, I leave. I'll make sure everything is ready to go the night before so there's no excuses. New year, new goal, new me! By the way, it's not just my New Year's Resolution, it's my monthly habit for January.

May 2014 be your best year yet!

52 Lists - Week 1 (again): Words That Touch My Soul

Last year I had planned to start doing weekly lists that I'd found on THIS website. I really loved the concept and her ideas for lists were great. Well, like many of my projects, I never stuck with it, but I still really love the idea. So we're giving it another go for this year. I make no promises though! Ha!

A lot changes over a single year and I'm curious to know if this list will change. I haven't looked at last years list, but I will link to it at the end and it will be interesting to see if and how it changes.

Here we go, a list of words that touch my soul:

Hope

Faith

Integrity

Grace

Family

Friends

Love

Compassion

Hospitality

Forgiveness

Relationship

Music

Laughter

Joy

Change

Renewal

Fresh

Children

Gentleness

Mercy

My old list is HERE and it's interesting to see which words have changed and which have remained constant over the past year.

What words touch your soul?

Something Old, Something New...And Something Habit-Forming!

I wanted to spend a little time reflecting on the last year, but not too much. A lot changed and I said goodbye to a period in our lives that I'm very happy to be putting behind us. This year has been about moving forward, growth and change for me and I don't want to spend much time looking back.

But there have been some great times that deserve to be remembered and cherished. Damien turned 6 and started Grade 1, Julia turned 5 and started Kindergarten. They're both doing amazing and we've been so blessed by their new school. Their old school wasn't bad, but I feel as though their new school is just a cut above, you know? I've certainly been impressed.

We spent time together as a family, taking trips to the petting zoo, parades and parks, not to mention BBQ's at Grandma's with friends and family. We have much to be grateful for.

But the single thing that stands out most this year is my mother-in-law opening her house to our family and letting us move in when we couldn't stay in our rental. While it was difficult for all involved, it's been a blessing. The kids have more space and freedom and we are able to start fresh. We'll be moving into our own place this spring and Nathan will be starting a new career. This is why we look forward and not back. The old place was depressing and small. We had some dark times there. I experienced bouts of depression and sadness, our marriage suffered. Was it all doom and gloom? Of course not. But as the children grew older and our tiny 1 bedroom house grew more and more cramped and small, we knew something had to change. I don't think it's a coincidence that when we left it behind, our marriage suddenly became the best it's been in years. I don't think it's a coincidence that I've never been happier, even though we're probably in the "worst" place we've been (in terms of finances. You know, with the whole "homeless", living with mom thing). I honestly feel so blessed to have this opportunity to start fresh. I feel like this is a time of rest and recovery, a time to rebuild our spirits and our relationships before we start out on the next phase of our lives. Does that sound weird? Maybe it is, but I don't mind. It's just how it is.

I spend a lot of time looking forward, dreaming and hoping. But things don't just happen. Well, sometimes they do, but not often. People get lucky because they are prepared for opportunity when it comes calling. You have to put work and effort in if you want things to go your way. So, I'm going to be developing a new habit every month. Basically, habits take about four weeks to develop. If you do one thing consistently for a month, you're well on your way to making that thing a life-long habit. So for each month of the year, choose one thing, just one, that you want to focus on. It's so much easier to change one thing at a time and build on them little by little than to try and change your entire life at once. One step at a time and by the end of the year, you'll have 12 brand new habits. That's twelve areas of your life transformed. If you think about your New Year's Resolutions, you probably don't even have a list of 12 things you want to change, but even if you do, doesn't it seem daunting? Most people give up on those lists by mid January. I know I do!

So I'm going to take it one step at a time, one month at a time, one habit at a time. I actually have a list of habits I want to work on and it was really hard to pick out the most important one, but I did. I've had a gym membership for a year, but I quit going a long time ago, even though we were locked in a contract. Talk about a waste of money! Just thinking about it gives me a headache. Not only that, but I had made some really good progress and then I quit. Now, I had a good reason at the time. My sciatica kicked into high gear and I was bed-ridden for over a week in agony. It took weeks to fully recover. There was definitely no way I was going to work out. Good excuse, right? Well, that was six months ago. Maybe even more! Ugh! That excuse dried up long ago. All I have left is laziness.

So this month my habit is this: Go to the gym 5 days a week. I've carved out some time in between Nate's classes and his job where the kids are in school and he's not using the car. I have no excuse! It's time to just get up and MOVE!

What about you? Will you start a new habit in January? Leave and comment and let me know!

Bittersweet December

I didn't really get many pictures from Thanksgiving (for some reason my camera doesn't take very good indoor candid shots) but we had a wonderful day. We ended up having our feast on Friday instead of Thursday so we spent Thursday relaxing and prepping some of the dishes we were going to have on Friday.

On Friday we enjoyed the fruits of our labor. The meal was great and it was so nice to spend time with family and friends. We played games till nearly midnight. I know it shouldn't take a special holiday to remind me of how blessed I am, but Thanksgiving just really emphasizes to me how much we truly have. I'm so grateful for my family, especially my husband and children, and our awesome friends.

One of my favorite days of the year isn't Thanksgiving though. It's right after. Not Black Friday (you'll never find me in a store on Black Friday, ha!) Just the fact that Thanksgiving is over makes me feel like it's finally ok to break out the Christmas music and decor. I force myself to wait, but now...freedom!

I love Christmas. It really is the most wonderful time of the year, at least for me. I've always loved it, but each year there's a little sadness mixed in with the joy. A little loneliness to remind me to cherish the days and the moments I have with those I love most. Fifteen years ago on December 4, my dad left us to be with God. My life completely changed. We had been writing a script for the children's Christmas play at my church together and then he was just gone. Christmas was spent without him for the very first time. A new year began for us, but not for him. My heart broke in a way that I don't think will ever really heal. Does it help to remind myself that he's with Jesus? Sometimes. It might be selfish, but I'd rather he was with me. I'd rather he was spending Christmas with his grandchildren.

So in between the gratitude of Thanksgiving and the joy of Christmas, I indulge in a little self-pity and sadness. Just for a moment, I yearn for something long gone, never to return. Because when I do, it makes the joy and gratitude just a little more poignant. I cling a little tighter to my husband and my children. I love a little bit harder. And I thank God for every moment I get with them, because the next could be the last.

My dad, Bill Stock, with my two brothers, Dave and Mark, about 1996 I think.

Girls Night In and Rag Wreaths

So I haven't written anything in FOREVER. But that's ok. I was busy. Busy making wreaths. Or something...

Two friends and I decided it would be fun to have a crafting night. Like many people, we have tons of craft ideas pinned to Pinterest, but haven't really gotten around to doing them. Well, last night was the night. We gathered our supplies, headed over to Nicole's house, ate pizza and crafted!

Our first project actually turned out really well. We made rag wreaths and I think we were all pleasantly surprised at how good they looked. You can find my pin to the original tutorial HERE, but I'm going to share our step by step as well.

You'll need:

A wreath form, any size
Several yards of fabric, depending on the size of your wreath form and the bulk of the fabric.
Ribbons, bows, flowers, etc, to embellish your wreath.


In preparation for the big night, I went to Joann's to pick out my fabric and wreath form. I knew I wanted my wreath to be Christmas-y, but I was a little daunted by all the different types and patterns of fabrics. I had picked out a nice green and a red/white polka dot fabric when I found the Christmas section. So I put those two back and picked an awesome Christmas plaid. However, when I got to the cutting station, the girl asked me what it was for. When I told her we were making rag wreaths, she said she'd made them before and I might have trouble with the knots holding because the fabric was so slippery. She suggested burlap, so off we went to look at the burlap. Ultimately, I decided on a pricey burlap with a silver sheen. I loved it but man, I definitely was not thrilled at the price ($12/yard). Luckily, I only needed 3/4 yard, but still...I was realllllly hoping this wreath turned out!

The first thing we did was cut our fabric into strips. With the burlap, the girl at Joann's suggested pulling out a string and then cutting along the empty space in order to prevent the burlap from fraying. After about 10 minutes and a few broken strings, I decided I really didn't care if it frayed and I was just going to cut it normally.

The tutorial suggested cutting it into 2 inch strips, but with how bulky the burlap was, there was just no way that was going to work, so I cut mine into 1 inch strips, and then I cut the strips into quarters. At this point, I began to realize the second downside of working with burlap, besides the price. It shed. A LOT. Not just frayed strings, but tiny particles that created a fine dust over the entire work surface. Burlap looks great and I'd use it again, but I would definitely be more prepared for the mess!

Nicole used a really nice off-white cotton fabric and Chrissy went with tulle and a green fabric.

Once all our strips were cut, it was time to start assembling the wreath. It's really easy, but time consuming. You basically tie all the strips onto the wreath form until the entire form is covered. Just fold the strip in half, loop it around one of the wires on the wreath form and pull the ends through the looped fabric. It's hard to explain, but easy to do.

If you're using one of those roller cutters, (which I highly recommend; they cut through even the burlap like butter!) be very careful. They're extremely sharp and I have the war wounds to prove it!

Part way done:

Nicole decided to add a pop of color to her wreath, but she didn't have the fabric on hand so she wasn't able to finish, but it's going to look amazing when she does! Chrissy isn't quite finished with hers either, but it's definitely coming together really nicely as well! I love the tulle!

Here is my finished product:

So after a great night of crafting, conversation and...consuming food...I got home. And then this happened...

I definitely recommend this project to anyone who wants something reasonably quick and easy. I think they look great and I'm definitely planning on making more. I really want to use the heart form like Chrissy did and maybe do some tulle with pink and red fabric for Valentine's Day. In the meantime, I'm already looking forward to our next crafting night. I'm probably going to be making a grapevine Christmas wreath and a calendar.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Edited: I've added the cost breakdown for the wreath for anyone interested.

Burlap: 1/2 yard @ 11.99/yrd @ Joann's
Cotton: 1/2 yard @ $2/yrd
Ribbon: 1/3 roll @ $1.49/roll @ Joann's
Pointsetta: $1.49 @ Joann's
Wreath Form: $1.49 @ Joann's

Total: $10.43

Judgement

I read an interesting article today about what Jesus meant when he said, "Judge not, lest ye be judged." It was written by Jimmy Akin from the National Catholic Register. You can read the entire article HERE.

The reason I found it interesting is because I used to belong to a forum for moms. You might think that sounds lovely and helpful, but it wasn't. If I based my opinion of women in general and mothers in particular on that single forum, I'd be convinced that women and mothers were the worst people on the planet. I found myself drawn to the drama, but it wasn't long before the negativity and hatred made me realize what a cesspool those forums were. One of the most common past-times on those forums was "judging" others. No matter what someone said, there was someone else right there to tell them how wrong, awful, evil or just plain stupid they were. I'm ashamed to admit that I was a member far longer than I should have been. Even if I didn't participate, even if I came to people's defense, I was still condoning it, standing by and watching it.

Another issue that brings the question of judgement to the front of my mind is gay marriage. It's a hot topic both in and out of the church, and it's one that I've drastically altered my opinion on over the last number of years. For a long time I believed that I should be against gay marriage because the Bible said homosexuality is wrong. At the same time, we're told by the world not to judge the sexual practices of others because if we do, that's hypocritical. After all, don't Christians sin too? Doesn't the Bible tell us not to judge? Doesn't it say "Let him who is without sin, cast the first stone?"

I think this article articulates very well what I've thought for a while now. I believe that many Christians, myself included, tend to look at issues from the wrong perspective. We look at the sin in others lives and we think it's our job to point it out and isolate the person based on the "degree" of their sin. Some things are ok to let go. We don't often hear about people being ostracized from the church for gossiping. Other things are more serious and we want to go to great lengths to inform these "sinners" just how evil they are, even to the point that we try to make their lives as difficult as we can.

And yet, does God differentiate between degrees of sinfulness? Am I not just as guilty and unworthy of redemption as anyone else? I don't think so. God commanded us to love each other. As this article states:

The right approach is to ask: Given that you will be judged for what you have done, what kind of judgement do you want? If we are in our right minds, we want a judgement done with mercy, compassion, and forgiveness. And that's the way Jesus wants us to treat others: He wants us to be merciful, compassionate, and forgiving to them."

I'm not the most patient or compassionate person in the world, but I think this life is hard enough as it is without us making it harder for each other. How can we show God's love and mercy when the conversation is about condemnation and judgement? God will judge. That's one thing we can be certain of. I only hope that when He comes to me, I have a little bit of love and mercy to show for my life.

Change

After a long hiatus (4 months), the nudging of friends has brought me back to my blog. Why did I stop posting? I don't really know. I got busy. I forgot. I couldn't keep the schedule I imposed upon myself. And then I felt guilty. I didn't want to be reminded of how I'd failed. Just another blog I couldn't keep up.

And then yesterday, two dear friends told me they missed my blog. And I realized that I did too! As I thought about why I had stopped and why I felt like I had failed, the only reason I could come up with was my own pride. This blog wasn't an obligation, or a job. It was an extension of my life, an outlet for my thoughts, a podium to display my children and family. There are no rules, no schedules, no failures. It's just a tool.

I wanted to emulate the great blogs I read. I wanted to be "successful." I wanted to be predictable and reliable, and when things didn't go my way, I gave up.

I can't say what my blog will be like. But I can say it will be about me and my life. Will there be daily posts? Probably not. But I hope there won't be any more four month gaps.

In other news, we're in the midst of moving. I've wanted to move out of this place so long that I can only feel excitement, even though the circumstances of our move aren't exactly ideal. We recently realized that we would have to make a choice between Nathan finishing school and being able to get through the coming months financially. It was no longer an option to do both. But Nate is only 2 semesters away from his degree. After everything we've gone through and worked towards, the thought of being unable to finish was heartbreaking.

With much trepidation, I called my mother in law. We need a place to stay for the next two school semesters. We can't afford our house anymore. We chose education over financial security. I was scared we were making the wrong decision. After all, I'd been called a fool for prioritizing education over short term financial stability. And maybe we are fools. I just knew that if my husband could finish his degree, then a year from now we'd be in a much better situation than if he quit school in order to provide for our immediate needs.

My mother in law, without hesitation, agreed to let us move in with her. Nate will be able to finish school and we'll be able to help her with childcare and around the house, as she is a single working mom. Even further, we'll be able to save money over the coming months so that when he's done school, we'll be able to move into a home that is bigger and better than the one we're currently living in.

In the end, I think we've made the best choice for our family and I'm excited. I know it will be difficult to have two families living together under one somewhat small roof, but we'll make it happen. My kids will have room to run around outside, they'll be able to play with their aunt whenever they want, they'll be going to the same school as her and they'll be able to form deeper bonds with their grandma and aunt.

So now I'm in the midst of packing and cleaning. Moving day is August 17! A lot of things are changing, but I think our lives are only going to get better!