Saturday, August 10, 2013


I read an interesting article today about what Jesus meant when he said, "Judge not, lest ye be judged." It was written by Jimmy Akin from the National Catholic Register. You can read the entire article HERE.

The reason I found it interesting is because I used to belong to a forum for moms. You might think that sounds lovely and helpful, but it wasn't. If I based my opinion of women in general and mothers in particular on that single forum, I'd be convinced that women and mothers were the worst people on the planet. I found myself drawn to the drama, but it wasn't long before the negativity and hatred made me realize what a cesspool those forums were. One of the most common past-times on those forums was "judging" others. No matter what someone said, there was someone else right there to tell them how wrong, awful, evil or just plain stupid they were. I'm ashamed to admit that I was a member far longer than I should have been. Even if I didn't participate, even if I came to people's defense, I was still condoning it, standing by and watching it.

Another issue that brings the question of judgement to the front of my mind is gay marriage. It's a hot topic both in and out of the church, and it's one that I've drastically altered my opinion on over the last number of years. For a long time I believed that I should be against gay marriage because the Bible said homosexuality is wrong. At the same time, we're told by the world not to judge the sexual practices of others because if we do, that's hypocritical. After all, don't Christians sin too? Doesn't the Bible tell us not to judge? Doesn't it say "Let him who is without sin, cast the first stone?"

I think this article articulates very well what I've thought for a while now. I believe that many Christians, myself included, tend to look at issues from the wrong perspective. We look at the sin in others lives and we think it's our job to point it out and isolate the person based on the "degree" of their sin. Some things are ok to let go. We don't often hear about people being ostracized from the church for gossiping. Other things are more serious and we want to go to great lengths to inform these "sinners" just how evil they are, even to the point that we try to make their lives as difficult as we can.

And yet, does God differentiate between degrees of sinfulness? Am I not just as guilty and unworthy of redemption as anyone else? I don't think so. God commanded us to love each other. As this article states:

The right approach is to ask: Given that you will be judged for what you have done, what kind of judgement do you want? If we are in our right minds, we want a judgement done with mercy, compassion, and forgiveness. And that's the way Jesus wants us to treat others: He wants us to be merciful, compassionate, and forgiving to them."

I'm not the most patient or compassionate person in the world, but I think this life is hard enough as it is without us making it harder for each other. How can we show God's love and mercy when the conversation is about condemnation and judgement? God will judge. That's one thing we can be certain of. I only hope that when He comes to me, I have a little bit of love and mercy to show for my life.

Wednesday, August 7, 2013


After a long hiatus (4 months), the nudging of friends has brought me back to my blog. Why did I stop posting? I don't really know. I got busy. I forgot. I couldn't keep the schedule I imposed upon myself. And then I felt guilty. I didn't want to be reminded of how I'd failed. Just another blog I couldn't keep up.

And then yesterday, two dear friends told me they missed my blog. And I realized that I did too! As I thought about why I had stopped and why I felt like I had failed, the only reason I could come up with was my own pride. This blog wasn't an obligation, or a job. It was an extension of my life, an outlet for my thoughts, a podium to display my children and family. There are no rules, no schedules, no failures. It's just a tool.

I wanted to emulate the great blogs I read. I wanted to be "successful." I wanted to be predictable and reliable, and when things didn't go my way, I gave up.

I can't say what my blog will be like. But I can say it will be about me and my life. Will there be daily posts? Probably not. But I hope there won't be any more four month gaps.

In other news, we're in the midst of moving. I've wanted to move out of this place so long that I can only feel excitement, even though the circumstances of our move aren't exactly ideal. We recently realized that we would have to make a choice between Nathan finishing school and being able to get through the coming months financially. It was no longer an option to do both. But Nate is only 2 semesters away from his degree. After everything we've gone through and worked towards, the thought of being unable to finish was heartbreaking.

With much trepidation, I called my mother in law. We need a place to stay for the next two school semesters. We can't afford our house anymore. We chose education over financial security. I was scared we were making the wrong decision. After all, I'd been called a fool for prioritizing education over short term financial stability. And maybe we are fools. I just knew that if my husband could finish his degree, then a year from now we'd be in a much better situation than if he quit school in order to provide for our immediate needs.

My mother in law, without hesitation, agreed to let us move in with her. Nate will be able to finish school and we'll be able to help her with childcare and around the house, as she is a single working mom. Even further, we'll be able to save money over the coming months so that when he's done school, we'll be able to move into a home that is bigger and better than the one we're currently living in.

In the end, I think we've made the best choice for our family and I'm excited. I know it will be difficult to have two families living together under one somewhat small roof, but we'll make it happen. My kids will have room to run around outside, they'll be able to play with their aunt whenever they want, they'll be going to the same school as her and they'll be able to form deeper bonds with their grandma and aunt.

So now I'm in the midst of packing and cleaning. Moving day is August 17! A lot of things are changing, but I think our lives are only going to get better!